Save yourself from being railroaded into doing things you don’t want to do with these tips.
Sometimes your nearest and dearest can expect you to do everything. Take back control – try doing less and asking them to do more.
When others ask you to do them big favours, listen carefully to what they are asking and decide if it is reasonable for you to help. Suggest an alternative to you doing it, or offer a solution that suits you better. Say ‘no’ to what you don’t want to do, without giving a long justification.
Learn to resist politely when you are being pushed into doing things you don’t want to do. Buy yourself time to consider the proposition and to indicate to the other person that your preferences should be considered. For example, you might say to a friend, ‘I’m not sure if I’m free then. I’ll check and come back to you.’ – or to your other half you might say, ‘Can I have a think about that?’ In a relationship, trade choices – say you’ll go to a concert, festival, play or film with your partner because you know they really want to, but you would like to choose next time.
If someone has lost their phone, glasses, wallet, bag, or whatever: no need to act the guilty party if their disappearance was nothing to do with you. Say, ‘They must be where you last had them What about in your coat pocket? Your bag? Down the side of the sofa? Would you like me to help look?’